Been in quite a strange low recently. Not entirely sure if it is because of my PMS or if it is just men are being real bastards. Didn't do a single thing today other than washing up and cleaning the kitchen at 12am. In a bit of a mess really... dunno what to think, what to do. Thoughts are so jumbled I don't even know how to put it on here properly. Feel like I'm losing my mind over nothing. This afternoon, in the break that I was not playing my NDS I just burst into tears for no apparent reason... We are not committed, yet I feel we're not even friends. The explanation was that it's a way to grow independent. Just have the guts to say what you are doing, rather than making up stupid excuses. What's more stupid is that I thought our minds were so in tune that unfortunately things didn't work out, maybe we'll be close friends. Feel like such an idiot, believing something like this may happen, as well as again believing people will stay the same forever and which of course they don't. What was I thinking? Or not thinking...

I really need to snap out of it. How can I transfer the energy on the work...? I just don't have any motivation at all.

Please deactivate that bloody emotional side of my head... I can't cope anymore...just feel like I'm drowning...